I've been listening to a lot of archived broadcasts from "Living on the Edge" online lately, & today I was listening to a message: "Trusting God when He doesn't make sense", & Chip Ingram said something that meant a lot to me... Just like Lazarus had to die so Jesus could raise him from the dead, I had to die to my own agenda before Jesus could be the "resurrection" for my life. When I accepted Jesus as my Savior as a little boy, I died to my sin nature because Christ died in my place & was my resurrection for a new life. I still sin as a Christian & have to confess my sin & ask forgiveness (1 John 1:9)-- the sin nature is still there-- but I am no longer controlled by that sin nature. If you do not know Jesus as your Savior, that's what the history of what happened with Lazarus (see John 11) means for you-- that you need to believe & accept that Jesus died in your place for your sin; & in accepting this you have died with Christ & are dead to sin; & as the "Resurrection & the Life", Christ will be a new life for you.
I have been a Christian for over 20 years, but I have realized that there is another application for me now. I am a person who likes to make plans & see them happen, & I had an agenda in mind that I was going into vocational ministry someday. I always felt like I was open to whatever God had for me to do, but I have since realized that I wasn't really as open as I thought I was or needed to be. After settling in Columbus, I always would say that Angie & I were in a period of "transition", & that we were open to whatever God had for us for now; but someday we were going to an unreached place to serve in a church plant. That's all well & good, but it could well be that's not what God wants us to do. I had to die to my own agenda & accept wherever God places us-- & now it looks like God is making things happen. God has a plan for me, & I just have to let my own plans die & wait & see what He will do!
In posting my thoughts on a blog, I hope that people will read this & God will use it to help others to grow; but even if nobody reads it, it's still helpful to me, because writing & sharing is how I think & learn (that's why my posts are so long!)
Showing posts with label testimony. Show all posts
Showing posts with label testimony. Show all posts
Monday, January 22, 2007
Thursday, January 11, 2007
I think I'm backwards!
I've been thinking lately about how the Lord has been working in my life, what He's been teaching me, & what I've been learning-- how things have changed. You know, as a Christian, one of the most important things you need to do is say to God, "Do whatever You need to do to teach me what you want me to learn; to get me doing what you want me to do." If Jesus is your Savior, you need to acknowledge Him as your Lord & live your life His way. "Salvation" & "Lordship" are not the same thing, & they don't happen at the same time, but a godly life is the result of being indwelt by the Spirit, which starts the moment you accept Jesus as your Savior.
I digress (but it's an important digression-- read through the book of Romans & think deeply about it to better understand where I'm coming from). When you ask God to do this, you don't know what He's actually going to do. God's plan is often different from what we expect.
I hear so many testimonies from people who were set in good jobs; & it was a big deal for them to drop them & go into the ministry-- & praise the Lord that He works that way in them! For me, however, it was the opposite. I remember when I first told the Lord that I was willing to do whatever He wanted me to do with my life-- I was 15, & a trainee at Summer Missionary Training School with Child Evangelism Fellowship. The Lord gave me so many opportunities to serve over the years, & He used me & I grew in Him; but I may have also gotten a wrong message because of my own pride & a narrow mind. I was so set on going into vocational ministry, that establishing a career never was on my mind. It wasn't until after I got married that I realized that life is expensive! I was always fine with other people working to make money & being the ones who support missionaries, but I was sure that Angie & I were supposed to be the missionaries whom the "business people" support. I would always tell people, "We're in transition, & we don't know what the Lord wants us to do yet"; but what I was really thinking was, "Our life hasn't started & we aren't doing anything valuable until we are on the mission field." I would tell other people, "Where you work is a mission field, & church plants need lay people to serve there"; but I never thought I was supposed to be one of the "lay people". But now I'm starting to understand that my family comes first over "ministry" (& that "ministry" is not always equivalent to an obedient relationship with God, which comes first over family), & that having a job for the purpose of supporting my family, along with showing hospitality to others, is valuable. This has given me peace that for now I am working for the state of Ohio in a Legal Office, & my first priority is to provide for & develop my family; & God can use me here in my local church for as long as He wants me here. I know a lot about what the Bible says & what the principles mean, but I need to learn about real life to know how the Bible teaching can be applied. My pastor called this process "seasoning", & that's what I need to be more effective wherever God places me.
I digress (but it's an important digression-- read through the book of Romans & think deeply about it to better understand where I'm coming from). When you ask God to do this, you don't know what He's actually going to do. God's plan is often different from what we expect.
I hear so many testimonies from people who were set in good jobs; & it was a big deal for them to drop them & go into the ministry-- & praise the Lord that He works that way in them! For me, however, it was the opposite. I remember when I first told the Lord that I was willing to do whatever He wanted me to do with my life-- I was 15, & a trainee at Summer Missionary Training School with Child Evangelism Fellowship. The Lord gave me so many opportunities to serve over the years, & He used me & I grew in Him; but I may have also gotten a wrong message because of my own pride & a narrow mind. I was so set on going into vocational ministry, that establishing a career never was on my mind. It wasn't until after I got married that I realized that life is expensive! I was always fine with other people working to make money & being the ones who support missionaries, but I was sure that Angie & I were supposed to be the missionaries whom the "business people" support. I would always tell people, "We're in transition, & we don't know what the Lord wants us to do yet"; but what I was really thinking was, "Our life hasn't started & we aren't doing anything valuable until we are on the mission field." I would tell other people, "Where you work is a mission field, & church plants need lay people to serve there"; but I never thought I was supposed to be one of the "lay people". But now I'm starting to understand that my family comes first over "ministry" (& that "ministry" is not always equivalent to an obedient relationship with God, which comes first over family), & that having a job for the purpose of supporting my family, along with showing hospitality to others, is valuable. This has given me peace that for now I am working for the state of Ohio in a Legal Office, & my first priority is to provide for & develop my family; & God can use me here in my local church for as long as He wants me here. I know a lot about what the Bible says & what the principles mean, but I need to learn about real life to know how the Bible teaching can be applied. My pastor called this process "seasoning", & that's what I need to be more effective wherever God places me.
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